


Letters

by TaraTyler



Series: SuperCorp [2]
Category: Supergirl (TV 2015), supercorp - Fandom
Genre: F/F, SuperCorp, i already regret posting, i hated this, oh well, this is happening guys, too late
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-26
Updated: 2017-02-26
Packaged: 2018-09-27 00:22:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9940181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TaraTyler/pseuds/TaraTyler
Summary: Kara is sickLena is saltyI attempted to do flashbacks





	

_set in season 2a, pre-Sanvers_

“Kara, I know that you nearly never get sick, but there is no good reason for you to be so incredibly dramatic about it.” Lena Luthor says in one of her most business like tones.

“No Lena, you don’t get it… I _never_ get sick. The last time that I got sick was during the National City earthquake incident.” Kara said with a meaningful look. “When I’m at full strength, human illnesses don’t affect me. I only get sick when I’ve had a solar flare.”

“Oh… is that why Supergirl was missing during the earthquake? You had blown out your powers?” Lena sits down on the edge of the bed and hesitantly pats Kara’s hand.

The two women hadn’t been together for very long and Lena had even more recently been let in on Kara’s secret. Kara and Lena had soldiered through one of the rockiest relationships that National City had ever seen. Snapper Carr had tried his hardest to twist his newest stringer’s relationship to his journalistic advantage, nearly leading Lena breaking it off when one of Kara’s investigations struck a little too close to home. It wasn’t until the new CEO of LCorp overheard Kara putting her job on the line in a verbal battle against her angry boss; clearly for the sake of her relationship with Lena. The worst fight of them all, though... had been when Kara _actually had_ broken it off.

_“No, Lena. If you aren’t going to be able to trust me, and to respect my privacy, then we can’t do this. We can discuss this again when I’ve calmed down.” Kara didn’t yell or scream or cry and that was what scared Lena the most._

_“But Kara, can’t you just try to understand why I would have my suspicions? Everyone in my life has wanted something from me; my money or my connections. Even you once used me to get to Roulette, but I tried Kara, I tried to trust you and after you started that story for Snapper and I caught you; I gave into my worst instincts…” Lena’s voice was desperate and Kara could tell that she was on the verge of tears._

_“I fight my instincts all day; everyday, Lena. Sometimes it doesn’t seem worth it anymore but still; I fight. You could’ve gotten Alex killed, Lena. With her cover blown, Edge would have stopped at nothing to get her out of the way… out of his organization. If Supergirl hadn’t gotten there in time, and trust me, it was on of her closest calls yet, I would’ve lost my sister; the one person in my life who has always been there for me. She’s been my constant since the day that I was dropped off at her doorstep.” Kara’s voice is so pained and unsounded that all Lena wants is to go to her and to make it better, but that would be the last thing that Kara wanted. Lena restrained herself._

_“How…”Lena’s voice broke and she seemed to change her mind about something. “How can I make this better? How can I fix us?”_

_“You can’t, at least, for now you can’t. I need time, Lena... but don’t worry, your secrets are safe with me.” Kara’s blue eyes flash bitterly before she turned to go, two packed bags hanging from a white-knuckled clenched fist._

_“I’m sorry, Kara. I never meant for it to turn out this way.” Lena apologized, and for once she actually meant it._

_“I know that you didn’t, and for the record, I’m sorry too.” Kara says, and Lena could just barely hear the crying as the door shut behind her._

It was three months before Kara could bring herself to move back in with Lena and one more before she decided to out herself to her girlfriend.

_“She deserves the truth, Alex! Don’t worry, I’ll leave you and J’onn and the DEO out of it. Those aren’t my stories to tell. You know that she can’t stand to not have all of the answers; but she put that to the side for me. I don’t want to hide anything from her. It kills me to not be truthful.” Kara stalks her sister around the DEO seeking her approval._

_“I know that you love her, Kara, but I don’t trust her.” Alex says shortly in response._

_“I felt the same way about Maggie Sawyer at first, you know.” Kara pointed out as Alex’s cheeks dyed pink._

_“Detective Sawyer has never almost gotten us killed, and on top of that, I’ve never suggested letting her in on our operations. She doesn’t even know the extent of our relationship. We’re just friends.” Alex huffs._

_“ _She’s_ just friends. You’re crushing on her _hard_.” Kara teases. “I don’t actually need your permission to come clean with Lean, I just wanted to give you warning and to ask your blessing. This is going to happen, Alex.”_

_Kara’s voice is firm and hard in a way that tells Alex that Kara has already made up her mind and that nothing Alex has to say will changed it. Her arms are crossed against her chest, blue eyes flashing dangerously._

_“Alright, Kara. It’s okay by me. I still feel like I’d like to know her better first, but if you trust her, then I trust her...via you.” Alex says with a heavy sigh. She seemed rather disappointed, but accepting. Kara’s face softened._

_“I know that you only want what’s best for me, Alex, and that’s Lena. She’s what’s best for me.” with a final swoosh of her cape, Kara swept from the DEO into the nightscape of National City._

_\-----/////-----_

_“Lena, I’ve come to kidnap you.” Kara said seriously, staring affectionately at her girlfriend, still steadily working away at her desk._

_“It wouldn’t be the first time. I’m sure that your best friend Supergirl would be there to save the day and… it would get me out of filling out these proposal responses, so feel free.” Lena shoves her chair back from the desk and throws the pen on top of the stack of documents._

_Kara offers Lena both of her hands and cocks her head to the side hopefully. Lena takes them, her delicately manicured fingers always feeling so much more fragile and small than Kara’s. With one of those blinding smiles that Lena was only just learning to soldier her way through, Kara turned to lead Lena out of the building. She scrambled to gather her things on the way out of the door. Once they were in Lena’s car, Kara slipped the driver a piece of paper._

_“Is there any way to convince you to tell me where we are going?” Lena asks Kara with what was supposed to look like an exasperated sigh. Instead it was just affectionate._

_“Probably a few ways that I could think of, but instead I’ll just let you know that I’m giving you something that you’ve always wanted from me.” Kara’s expression grew serious. “I want you to take this as a sign that I’m serious about this...about us. I don’t want to hold anything back from you anymore. I want you to know that I trust you implicitly.”_

_“Kara, you’re starting to worry me.” Lena says as she listens to the blonde woman ramble, though Kara’s face remained serious._

_“Nothing is wrong. In fact, there is the potential for a few things to go very very right.” Kara pats Lena’s hand and smiles nervously, her knee bouncing up and down._

_“Okay, honey. Whatever you say.” Lena’s brow was still furrowed in worry though._

_“Have you ever wondered why Supergirl has always been there to save you?” Kara asked suddenly, taking Lena by surprise. “Even though a lot of your work goes against everything she stands for?”_

_“She’s a hero and heroes save people. It’s in the job description, right? I value her rescues, sure, but that doesn’t mean I have to make her my best friend. It wouldn’t be very heroic of her to let me die just because I’ve made life a bit harder for her, and her fellow aliens. She would be fine if she didn’t insist on hiding amongst us humans.” Lena says in that powerful tone of voice that she took on when he was really passionate or sure about something._

_“Are you _really_ sure about that Lena? Something has to drive her to do what she does.” Kara says, putting careful thought into each sentence. She hadn’t meant to get caught up in this debate again, especially not right then._

_“What does that have to do with anything?” Lena asked._

_“Think about it. She has all of these enemies that she protects National City from, and they’re strong. Some are equally as powerful as her and some are stronger. Don’t you think that these ‘people’ wouldn’t use the humans that Supergirl cares about against her?” Kara posed the question to Lena as though she were simply playing the devil’s advocate. The two often did this when debating._

_As she spoke she stepped from the car and opened Lena’s door for her, ever the gentlewoman._

_“Where are we? You know how I feel about surprises, Kara.” Lena asked rather anxiously as Kara shut the door and sent the driver away._

_“We are in the middle of the desert, actually. No one is around in any direction for at least five miles. I wanted the two of us to have total privacy for this.” Kara said, blue eyes wide and hopeful._

_“Okay. I trust you.” Lena said hesitantly, eyebrows drawn together in worry. “Is everything okay?” she asked again._

_“I’ve told you before that there are some parts of my life that I can’t share with you; that I’m a private person, right?” Kara said, taking each of Lena’s hands in her own, thumbs brushing over the knuckles. “I know that that always bothered you, no matter how much you pretended that it didn’t.”_

_“Get to your point, sweetheart. This is kind of freaking me out.” Lena says, shifting her weight from foot to foot._

_“I just want you to know first that I love you and never ever wanted to hurt you or frighten you or however you are about to feel after I tell you this.” Kara’s exhale is more of a shudder as she let’s go of Lena’s hand and starts to unbutton her shirt._

_Lena was so distracted by Kara’s fingers that it took awhile for her to notice that she was having to tilt her head back to keep Kara in her sights. The shirt fell open, and then off, landing Lena’s feet. The ‘S’ stood out proudly against the blue of the shirt, even when the rest of the suit was missing. The final nail in the coffin were the glasses and hair, Kara was unrecognizable as she floated ten feet above the sand._

_“You’re...you’re _her_. You’re one of _them_.” Lena sputtered as all o the pieces fell into place in her mind._

_“I’ve wanted to tell you for so long Lena, but I was terrified of you hating me. I wouldn’t be able to bear it.” Kara said quickly, dropping back down to the earth._

_“Everything that you’ve said about being her friend, everything that you’ve guessed about how she thinks, what you’ve written and our entire conversation from _just now_ about her...all of it was lies?” Lena thinks aloud._

_“I was afraid that if you knew, that you would be put in even more danger than you already have been in. People that know about me...tend to…” Kara flinched visibly at the thought. “They don’t tend to stick around.”_

_Something inside of Lena softened and she reached out to grop Kara’s bicep, but shrank back at the last second._

_“Every time that she almost died to save me… it was you? Every self-sacrificing, stupid, ‘take me and leave her’, was you? You’ve lied to me for _months_ , you let me take you for granted for _months_ , disappeared at random to go save the whole God-forsaken _world_ and left me to wonder where you were when you could have been dying. Sometimes you _were_ dying and I wouldn’t have know. I might never have known.” Lena’s tears finally crest out of her eyes as she emphasizes her words with a light punch to the chest._

_“Lena, under your desk at the apartment, an envelope has been taped to the bottom of the topmost drawer for the past...well, since we started whatever we were at the beginning. My crest is pressed into the seal. In the event of my death, Alex was to alert you to its presence. Before you say anything else, or tell me to get out of your life, or that you never want to see me again, I’d like for you to read it.” Kara’s voice is gentle and pained, a broken heart shining out through blue eyes that had seen too much. “The car will back soon, or I could take you there myself.”_

_“I’ll go on my own… I’m going to need time to think. It may take a while for me to wrap my mind around it all. You’ve kept this from me for a very long time… but for the most part I can understand why. I’ll call you, okay?” Lena thought out loud for a moment; glancing up to meet Kara’s glittering blue eyes with her own._

_“Know that I love you.” Kara said. “And know that I would never do anything that would hurt you.”_

_“I know, and I’ll call you later so we can talk about it, okay?” Lena looks sad but forces her best reassuring smile._

_Kara nods._

_“Okay, we’ll talk later.” she offers a watery smile and takes off into the night sky, leaving only a blue streak in her wake._

_It didn’t take long for the car to arrive back to pick Lena up and the businesswoman immediately made a beeline for the letter that Kara had told her about._

“Are you reading that again, Lena? Don’t you have that memorized at this point?”” Kara asked in her hoarse, sick voice as Lena returns with chicken noodle soup.

“I do have it memorized actually, but it looks better in your handwriting and sounds better in your voice.” Lena says with a hesitant smile.

“Even when I’m sick and gross?” Kara asked.

“Even then.”

“Alright, I guess.” Kara concedes as Kena slides into the bed next to her, head pillowed on Kara’s shoulder. As soon as the sick hero began to read, Lena was back in that moment.

>   
>  _Dear Lena,  
>  If you’re reading this, something bad has probably happened to me. I won’t hazard a guess at it now, because their are just so many options. Hopefully, I am with my parents in Rao’s light. You don’t know Rao, but he was my god and the god of my people. You see, Lena, I’m a Kryptonian (was a Kryptonian?) and I am/was Supergirl.  
>  Please know that I never wanted to keep all of this from you and that this doesn’t mean that I don’t/didn’t trust you. I love you, Lena Luthor, and wanted nothing more than to protect you from my secret. Knowing who and what I am does something to the people around me, just look at my sister.  
> I know that you’re probably confused right now, but I want you to know that I never once doubted my feelings for you. Ever since I first stepped into your office, I knew that you would change my entire world.  
> You are so much stronger than you know, Lena Luthor In your life you will shine a light so much brighter than your scumbag of a brother could have ever imagined. I’ve known from the beginning that you will go on to do great things. You never needed me… whether it was as Kara Danvers, investigative reporter, or as Supergirl, always there to catch you when you fell (from airplanes, balconies, helicopters, ladders… the list does go on). Promise me that you will continue to shine long after I am gone.  
> Know that I am at peace with whatever has happened to me. I was never meant for this world and when I finally got here; my reason for being here was gone as well. I can think of no better way to go out than in defense of this planet that took me in and accepted me when it didn’t have to  
> Please look after Alex and make sure that she doesn’t blame herself. Remind her regularly that she deserves a normal life. I would also ask that you both participate in my last rites. Alex has been briefed on the details.  
> Know that I love you.  
> Know that you gave me something that I never thought possible for someone like me.  
> Even now that I’ve gone to be with the many that I have lost, I will love you still from Rao’s light.  
>  Kara Zor-El ___  
> 

In places on the worn piece of paper, Lena could still identify the old tear stains from the first time she had read the letter, right after Kara had revealed her true identity. The heroine herself got lost in yet another coughing fit, and Lena rushed to passe her the tea.

“You know that that letter won’t do anymore. Alex has another ‘in case of my death’ letter locked away for you at the DEO. After I told you about this one, I wrote new ones for everybody.” Kara told her. “You go into this business knowing what the cost may be. I knew all of that the very first day that I took off to catch Alex’s plane.

“We don’t deserve you, Kara Zor-El.” Lena kisses Kara’s overly warm cheek as she wraps an arm around her.

“”I believe that everyone deserves a chance.” Kara says hoarsely but firmly.

“You’re too good for us.”

“I don’t believe that. Not when there are people like you, Cat Grant, Eliza, Alex, Winn, and James on this planet. I fight for the people like you. You make everything that I go through worth it.” Kara kisses Lena’s temple and lays back, setting her soup to the side.

“I love you, Kara.” Lena says, sliding away to let Kara sleep.

“Not nearly as much as I love you.” Kara argues.

“I sincerely doubt that.”


End file.
